readingthedark

I'm mostly running the show at the registers when I'm at the box-shaped megabookplace.

This leads to a few odd exchanges because some of the attendees of the Crazy Bookstravaganza are shopped out and tuckered by the time they get to the counter. A personal favorite was:

"Would you like to purchase one of our membership cards?" (me)
"You're welcome." (their response)

No further communication on that one got more than a bemused but slightly rictus smile from either one of us.
(This led to the realization that I must ask the questions but that I cannot force the answers.)

And there've been a few others like that.

"Would you like gift receipts for these books?"
"No. They'd better like 'em."

A co-worker, a week or two ago, before it got as crazy as it is now and before we were open that day, did a wonderful bit that went something like:

"Somewhere, a future bookstore customer is stubbing their toe while getting the morning paper, they are forgetting their heart medication and becoming angry with the world around them, they are forgetting their coupons and gathering up change so they can pay in pennies...the flat tire is going to send them over the edge..."

Ideas like that were funny two weeks ago. Now they're a bit less funny.

PS --

If you're going to pay by check,
it will be helpful --
if you don't know which store you're in --
for you to ask.

Yes, as silly as that sounds
because no one wants to admit that they've shopped for hours and they don't know where they are,
but it's better to confess,
for you to admit that you don't know the name of the store you're in.

I'm serious it's better to ask,
rather than make something up that's not even close or even the name of a competitor:
There is no such thing as Mixleplik and Hoegbottlebreath Booksellers.

Ask, so you won't have to become saddened by your own stupidity as you rip the check up and wonder where you are...